March 23, 2009

Mitch & Roland: #52 Sandwich

As you may or may not have noticed, the Mitch and Roland comics have a rich history of sandwich related humour going all the way back to the very first one.

In fact, about half of all the comics so far are on the subject of food, or are related to food and eating. What does this say about me? That I'm fat, obviously. But more importantly, what does this say about society? That we're hungry about half the time, I suspect.


March 18, 2009

Always Bring a Flare Gun When Shopping

This past weekend, I came to the realization that I witness amazing things all the time. Like what, you ask? Well, when I go to any of the huge shopping areas or department stores in Seoul, I'm always amazed by the cleaning ladies who must work amoung the endless droves of customers bustling about. Seriously, that's an impressive feat.

I can't go more than twenty minutes in a busy shopping area before I begin to feel my blood pressure rising and the urge to strike someone creeping up in my brain. People are constantly getting in your way, crashing into you, knocking your shopping bags around; it's hot, stuffy, and unbelievably loud. I can feel my pulse rattling my teeth and if I don't get out of there, I might start shrieking like a lunatic.

And it's my choice to be there! It's my leisure time on the weekend, and I can leave if I wish. But these women have to be there all day! They work there! They're weaving their way through the crowd, hunched over, mopping a floor that is constantly being walked on. It must be so frustrating and claustrophobic. Somehow they can do that day after day without freaking out, stabbing anyone, or even whacking them in the back of the legs with a broom.

So the Turnipism community (me) is proud to honour these cleaning ladies with the award for "Most Impressive Show of Restraint In a Situation That Would Cause an Average Person to Flip Out and Begin Clawing Their Way to the Nearest Exit Whilst Hyperventilating and Crying". Congratulations.

Also, on an unrelated matter, if you heard tell of some dude flipping out in a department store and clawing his way to the nearest exit whilst hyperventilating and crying, ... it wasn't me.

March 11, 2009

Mitch & Roland: #51 Rental



I will always be amused by crappy names for movie sequels. While there are tons in real life, it doesn't stop me from imagining my own. Here are some additional names I thought would be good for a "Swordman" sequel:

Swordman 2: Sword Harder
Swordman 2: The Swordening
Swordman 2: Showdown at Sword Mountain
Swordman 2: The Blade of Sharpness
Swordman 2: Swordmen
Swordman 2: Look Who's Cutting Now
Swordman 2: Lord of the Sword
Swordman 2: Passion of the Sword
Swordman 2: Full Throttle
Swordman 2: Slash to the Future
Swordman 2: The Legend of the Slightly Sharper Sword

and of course,

2 Sword 2 Furious

March 6, 2009

The Best Cars Are the Ones You Can Read

I'm always on the look out for new and interesting uses (and misuses) of English on clothing, products, etc. I've shared my discoveries on this blog before. Here are three more:

In my neighborhood I saw a man exercising outside and he was wearing a jacket. On the back of the jacket was half a maple leaf split down the middle, and next to it the words "Fuckin' Freezing". First of all, I know that's not a good example of "Engrish", but it's worth mentioning. And secondly ... I want a jacket like that! That kicks ass.

And speaking of freezing, why is it still so damn cold? The days bounce back and forth between moderately sunny/cool, and skin-cutting ice wind. I want mother nature to make up her mind! Sometimes I wear a summer jacket and it's not enough, and other times I bundle up and wear winter gear, and I'm so hot I'm cooking.

I'm getting off topic. Sorry.

Another thing I saw, also in the neighborhood, was a bar called "Boobi Boobi". A bit misleading, since the place seems to have nothing to do with boobies. Not even Blue-Footed Boobies. What a rip.

And finally, I happened upon a car with odd text written on it recently. First of all, the car was orange, which is really out of place in Korea where all vehicles have the same colour palette of gray, dark blue, and grayish-blue. So, there was the bright orange car parked along the street with text written out on the hood at an angle. It read, "I will never stop drive. It's the reason for I exist."

Hardcore. I really hope the guy who owns that car, was the same guy with the "Fuckin' Freezing'" jacket. That would make my day.

March 2, 2009

Inappropriate Campsites

Cows in Cinema: Another Triumph

Hey, all. Hope your weekends rocked fully and completely. Mine was rich with movies

One movie that I feel the need to mention is a Korean documentary called "Weonangsori", the English title being "Old Partner". The movie itself has slowly taken off by word of mouth buzz and is now breaking records in Korean cinema. I went to see the movie on Saturday with a close friend, only knowing vaguely that it was about an old man and his cow. I hadn't expected much.

Let me say plainly, that it is one of the finest, most moving films I've ever seen.

The movie tells of an elderly husband and wife who live in the picturesque mountains of Korea, living a simple and devoted life, farming the earth by traditional means. The story centers on the man and his cow, a creature he has worked with each day for 40 years. We watch as they endure their work and hardships together, nearing the end of their lives as true companions.

The film is unlike any other I can think of. It seems to step outside of the documentary genre and become something entirely new. I felt like I was simply witnessing a heartbreaking piece of life. It's beautiful, charming, and altogether sad.

How sad? Well, I have to say, with no embarrassment, that this movie brought me to tears. And not just an "I got the sniffles" moment; I was crying. When the movie sweeps into it's gut-wrenching conclusion, I turned into a weeping wreck, my friend was bawling, and I could hear others around us doing the same. It's not depressing like many movies I've seen in the past, it just has this quality of being poetically sad. As I said, it's an incredibly moving film.

I don't usually write about these things on this blog, saving most of my energy for drawing and ranting, but I was really blown away by this film. It's been on my mind constantly since seeing it, and I still feel occasionally overwhelmed by the images it presented. I can only hope that by some miracle it will find it's way to western audiences (perhaps on DVD), and I strongly urge anybody who loves animals, cares for nature, or appreciates film to see it. You will not be disappointed.