Mitch & Roland: #30 Lava

I uploading this comic a day early since I will be too busy Saturday to do it then. As you have probably heard via this site or by reading any newspaper, I'm returning to Canada. I'll be back in rockin' Nova Scotia in no time at all. I expect you all to be there with wine, donuts, and hugs ready.

Can you feel the excitement in the air? I can, and it's freaking electric.

The Tide (and your cholesterol) is High

This week has mostly been devoted to packing my luggage and preparing for my flight this Saturday. My stomach is tightening into a superb knot of anticipation and anxiety. Happy to go, but sad to leave.

The doctor is in yet again, here to enlighten you on the truth behind the ocean's strange movements. Turns out, it might just be your fault.

Slake Thy Thirst!

While guzzling some Korean bottled water at the mall today, I learned something about its name. Called Soon-Soo, the name translates with two meanings: the first is 'purity', and the second meaning is that of 'innocence' or 'naivety'. I find that interesting.

Maybe you don't, but I do, and that's all that matters. Anyone who has drank a bottle of Evian has surely noticed what it spells in reverse. What are these water companies trying to tell us? I'm sure their goal was to convey the simplicity of water itself, but I can't help but feel like it's directed more at the drinker. Are we simpletons for forking out the dough for something as basic and essential as water. Do these companies see us as unsuspecting 'children' who can be easily persuaded?

Bottled water has become a fact of life, yet we all can recall a time when it was just becoming trendy. Mocked at first, and then consumed by all. It makes me think of comedian Jim Gaffigan and his first impressions of seeing bottled water for sale: "Ha! Bottled water! You guys get a load of this. They're selling bottled water. (long pause)... I guess I try one."

So maybe the names mean nothing, but sometimes it feels like anything - and perhaps eventually everything - could be marketed and sold to us. Given enough exposure to a product, we seem to give in. Having said that, be wary of cans of air for sale with names like Peer Pressure and C'mon.

Mitch & Roland: #29 Fear

This is it, my final week in Korea. The days are flying by at mach speed now, and by next Saturday I'll be on a grueling 76 hour flight back to maritimes. Ugh, not looking forward to that. A flight that long is truly a trial of human endurance. For me there is usually no sleep, no rest, and no happiness. Just zoning in and out as waves of stress crash up against me, my lower body becoming numb from immobility, and the constant roar of the engines and constant flow of crappy meals and snacks to keep me awake.

Last October I made the trip home for a brief visit and I think I'm up to the challenge yet again. I think my body has healed. Still, I can't help but be afraid.

Speaking of being afraid:

Stork Theory Alternative

This week the Doctor tackles one of world's greatest mysteries. A question that each and every one of us has pondered at least once. Where does life begin, and what unthinkable action brings it about? The answer may surprise you.

Close Encounters and Whatnot

With only about ten days remaining in Korea I've been thinking back on all the interesting experiences I've had here. Some of the most memorable and surreal experiences have been brief encounters with strangers. Usually it was people approaching me because, hey, I look different, and they figured they would test out some English. Here's a list of some of those encounters that come to mind:

• When shopping alone in a department store in Jamsil I stopped at a conveyor belt sushi bar for a little snack. While I ate, a woman in her fifties sat down next to me and after a few minutes of silence she asked me if I thought the sushi was delicious. I told her I did, and we ended up having a short broken conversation in Korean about Japanese and Korean food.
• A drunken man approached me in a PC bang and wanted to talk about music. A few minutes later he was singing 'Hotel California' for me and dancing.
• On my way to work a man started talking to me. I found out he was from Sri Lanka and he soon insisted that I should go to Sri Lanka someday. He then asked to see my passport. I got the hell out of there.
• While he never spoke to us, Sam and I watched a middle-aged man molest some statues at the park. I'll never forget that golden moment of randomness. The whole story can be found here.
• My friend Edison and I were travelling on the subway when a young Korean man sat down next to us. He enthusiastically began to tell of his hip hop dance aspirations, and how he wanted to someday make it big in America as a dancer. He then proceeded to show us his moves with an assortment of dance styles, including break dancing on the subway car floor.
• After bumping into the same man several times in my neighborhood and politely declining his offer to go drinking, I finally gave in. We stopped at a nearby bar and he bought me a beer. He didn't speak any English, but I could understand enough to talk with him a bit. Before I was done my beer I had met his friend, father, and wife.
• When visiting Korea's treasured southern gate (Sungnyemun), my friend Sam and I were quizzed on Confucian symbolism by a 68-year-old volunteer guide.
• A few days ago while walking to my usual Internet cafe a man passing on the street asked me, in Korean, where I was going. I told him I was going to a PC bang. He mimicked typing and I said yes. Then he nodded and went on his way. Oh yeah, and he was wearing shorts, slippers, and a t-shirt rolled up to his armpits.

There have been many more than these and each day has been another chance for some quirky individual to reach out and start some inexplicable conversation. For the most part I appreciate the effort.

Mitch & Roland: #28 Pet

Wow, another busy week. My days in Korea are rapidly flying by and I'll be back in Maple Country in about two weeks. I can't believe it. I've been living in Seoul for 25 months. But I've grown homesick, and the time has come to head homeward.

On Wednesday (which was Korea's independence day) I went to a Black Eyed Peas concert. I won tickets through a cross promotion with a restaurant. Hooray! Okay, well I'm not a huge fan, but the price was right, so I went and checked out the madness as thousands of Koreans scrambling to get a look at Fergie. I got to hear things like "Where is the love?" - my favorite Peas song - and even "London Bridge", which I don't think is technically a song.

Anyhow, since my departure is fast approaching I've been busy with preparations and haven't been able to devote much time to blogging. Having said that, here's a comic to distract you. Hey! Look over there!

Stop it or you'll go blind.

Very few people recognize the serious dangers that go along with reading. Each year billions of people suffer from mild to severe paper cuts as they thumb through their favorite novels, and by the time you've finished reading this paragraph The Complete Works of Shakespeare will have crushed someones foot, femur, or a passing stray dog.

So this week Dr. Knowz-it helps Sammy understand the dangers of being a bookworm.

ZOMBIES: Part Six

Hello to all, I return. I bring gifts of gold, frankincense, and brains. I know many of you had thought the epic saga would not continue, but fear not. The days have been busy and sometimes it's hard to hunker down and ink a few pages without a proper light table.

So here it is. Let us return to the zombie diner and see what unfolds next. Could it be a blanket filled with zombie dogs? Not likely, but you never know.

Introducing Dr. Knowz-it

As of this week the lone panel comics are no more. I've retired them. I've taken them out back behind the shed and done away with them. Why? Meh, I was bored with it. But if you ever want to relive those weird memories they will live on forever in the blog archive. Time to move onto new and better things. From today I present to you Dr. Knowz-it, a weekly educational comic strip.

Hopefully it will help you live a better life and make you look at the world a little differently. This weeks subject: Oranges.

Mitch & Roland: #27 Coffee

Coffee. It's the liquid that fuels us all. I've never been a big java-ite, but I see the appeal. Strangely I find the smell of coffee beans much more enjoyable that the taste of the basic drink they bring us. But add some more ingredients and sweet bits and now you're talking. Caramel Macchiato everyone, get with the program.

On Thursday a student excitedly told me that he had drunk coffee the previous day. He informed me that he made it with five 'big spoons' of coffee, five 'big spoons' of sugar, and one spoon of salt. I asked him why on earth he would put salt in his coffee and he explained that it had been 'very much sweet', making gestures like he had eaten something spicy.

That made me laugh. "Ah, too sweet, this needs salt. Oh man, now it's too salty, this needs more sugar."

Cracking the Dress Code