Why is it that so many people seem incapable of maintaining even basic levels of cleanliness? Doesn't standard bathroom etiquette, as well as plain common sense, tell us that you should wash your hands after you use the toilet? Shouldn't you rinse your key areas before leaving home and putting yourself in close proximity to strangers, friends, and co-workers? Doesn't it mark you as a hateful idiot to throw trash in a drinking fountain, or gum in a urinal?
Every time I use a public washroom I lose a bit more respect for humankind. Just today while I was washing my hands in the bathroom at work, a dude came out of one of the stalls ... and kept on walking out of the washroom without even looking at the soap. That son of bitch, I thought. Even if I wash my hands three times and leave the washroom while carefully avoiding contact with the door handles, there's no way to know what that guy has touched, or will touch, the rest of the day.
You want to know why people get sick? Because all over the world people are taking craps without washing their hands. They touch a chair. You touch a chair. You rub your eyes. Boom! Pink eye.
Also, it's not like I'm a clean freak. I believe you need a little dirt and bacteria in your life to be truly healthy, but there's a limit. Why do I so often walk into bathroom stall and discover that someone had a bad aim? Or that they didn't want to flush the toilet? Or that they decided to drop a whole roll of toilet paper in the bowl? I don't know why! It's completely unnecessary!!
Sadly the filth is hardly restricted to the bathroom. When I was at work I saw something awful. On a table near the window I spied a human nail. Was it a fingernail? I doubt it. This thing had to have been the toenail from the big toe of the dominant foot it was so goddamn big. It was so big and yellow I thought the moon had fallen to earth, and I'm pretty sure two children could have played see-saw on it, and it would have creaked audibly as they did.
Ugh, I think I made myself a little sick.
Tell me I'm the only one who encounters this kind of shit on a regular basis. Please tell me the world is really not filled with such fiends. Because every time I find a wad of wet gum on the underside of desk, I begin to question things. I thought I was working alongside adults with functioning brains, but now I'm not so sure. A public washroom is not a free pass to act like a baboon, and there's no excuse for not taking simple steps to protect the health and comfort of yourself and others.
It's the new year. One more chance to clean up your act.
6 comments:
I was at the bowling alley with Cam when nature called. It was league night so the building was filled with old farts. I enter the washroom as 2 old men leave, I use the only available urinal as the old man beside me finishes and leave. In the stall behind me there were noises, scary noises that haunt my dream to this very day. I strain to get the rest out fast as the smell of decaying flesh and shit filled the air like a dense fog. I go to wash my hands and notice that the sink is bone dry... I turned on the hot water tap and started soaping up when I hear the flush followed by the words "Thats not good" and another failed gargled flush. The Crypt Keeper quickly leave the stall and exits the washroom while coughing up what was left of his lungs. I'm standing there gagging on my own vomit, not only from the smell, but by the actions. I turn to dry my hands to find there is no paper towels, not even the wall mount that hold them. There is also no air dryer... only a garbage can over stuffed with toilet paper and 1 wreaking stall. I dry my hands on my own pants because I knew where they had been and leave, never to return.
A terrifying and haunting tale that proves what I'e always known; the most disgusting people are old.
I won't go into too much detail here. I can't in good conscience tell the whole tale, but I used to work at the local movie theatre in Sydney.
On at least three occasions that I know of - two that I actually witnessed - a character we affectionately called "the shit nazi" did things to our bathroom stalls that haunt me in my nightmares.
I think you can infer the kind of carnage this individual wrought.
Once I saw that, I knew there was no hope for humanity.
I think it's clear that anytime your work deals with the public, you find out the public are pigs.
Shit Nazi... goddamn.
It was a vision I can never erase.
Nathan has many a time confessed to me the rush he gets from leaving his toenails scattered about your workplace. He's hoping to get a sort of cult following on the internet, and have people eventually trace it back to him a la Dark Knight scavenger hunt campaign. He's weird like that.
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