Hungry and I Know It

It's been a while since I've done a song parody, so here we go with my take on LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know It". If you don't know, LMFAO is the spiritual successor to the rocking party-obsessed throne once held by Andrew W.K. Here's the music video for your following along pleasure, since it wouldn't let me embed the video directly (Lame!). Here we go.

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When I walk on by, I got handfuls of ham and pie.
Ice cream in my face, and pockets full of sandwiches just in case, yeah
This is how I roll, handmade sweat pants out of control
I just got banned from a grocery store
But like Oliver Twist, yes I want some more, yo!

Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

Girl look at this body, Just look at this body, My joints are shoddy,

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

When I walk in the room, this is what I see
Everybody stops 'cause they feel my gravity
I got a yearning deep inside and I ain't afraid to show it (show it, show it, show it)


I'm hungry and I know it
I'm hungry and I know it


When I'm at the mall, you'll find me eating burgers at Mr. Big and Tall
When I'm at the beach, I'm grabbing all the seafood that's in my reach.
Yes, I love fried dough, come on ladies it's time to go
We'll make a few stops, each one is a buffet.
No restraining order's gonna get in my way (Watch!)

Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

Girl look at this body, Just look at this body, Someone's been naughty

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

When I walk in KFC, the owner starts to cry

He can hear my stomach rumbling, there's no reason to deny

I got a mission on my mind and I don't intent to blow it (blow it, blow it, blow it)

I'm hungry and I know it
I'm hungry and I know it
I'm hungry and I know it

Check it out
Check it out
Tacos and falafels and some waffles, yeah!
Tacos and falafels and some waffles, yeah!
Tacos and falafels and some waffles, yeah!
Tacos and falafels and some waffles, yeah, yeah!
Got room for jello, man.
Got room for jello, man 
Yeah I'm hungry and I know it

Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body, Girl look at this body

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

Girl look at this body, Just look at this body, I think I want biscotti,

uh, a-uh, I eat out!

Yeah I'm hungry and I know it!

Cine-Verse! Teeth (2007)

Guard your fingers and your groin,
And beware of biting teeth.
One set can be found above and another found beneath.

A small town girl with morals
Who is anything but mean.
And down below in hiding is a penile guillotine.

There's a bear trap in her bloomers,
And each dry hump is a risk,
It's her chamber of secrets with a snapping basilisk.

Every guy around her,
Tries to get her in the sack.
When they get to third base there may be no coming back.

The burden of her love life,
As a victim of mutation,
Means that every lusty meeting leads to painful separation.

While mutilated manhood
Is not pleasant to observe,
Each man that she encountered got just what he had deserved.

Blank Blank

And now for a short fake excerpt from the nonexistent novel The Armadillo Diaries by yours truly.

"How could you?!" she cried, even louder than before. With both hands pressed against the glass Linda began to scream hysterically:

 "I hate you! You're nothing but a fathead, lamebrain, dorkwad, gasbag, blockhead, halfwit, dipshit, numb nut, ass wipe, jerk off, dickhead, dingbat, nut job, dumbass, shithead, sleazeball, scumbag, low life, douche-bag, bullshit, asshole, fuckface!!"

It was then that the manager approached the lobster tank and asked Linda to leave the restaurant. 

 

Mitch & Roland: #64 Rumor