Spiderwebs
I don't hate spiders outright, they generally mind their own business and build amazing structures that defy logic. What I do hate is that their webs are always colliding with my face. You know you hate this too. You're walking along, enjoying your soft serve cone and then wham, big face full of spiderweb. And you can't just simply brush it off. It's sticky, invisible, and impossible to grab. All you can do is screech like a little girl as you flop about hoping that the spider wasn't in the center when you collided with it. The worst thing is that it usually happens when you're walking somewhere that it wouldn't make sense for a web to be; a web suspended by nothing! There's nothing more aggravating and confusing then to land your face in a batch of web while walking across an empty field.
Stores that Try to Do Everything
Why is it that every big chain store wants to be it's own self sustaining universe? I'm not even focusing on Wal-Mart; this is a more wide spread problem. In the last ten years it seems like every grocery store is expanding to also sell clothes, furniture, toys, electronics, housewares, and everything else under the sun. It seems like these businesses are trying to help people achieve "one stop shopping", but that is quite far from reality. The truth is now you have to go to store after store after store because you can never predict what they may or may not have. Pharmacies sell groceries, grocery stores have pharmacies, electronic stores sell furniture, furniture stores sell electronics, department stores have fast food spots, and fast food spots have playgrounds. It's madness! Okay, maybe it's not that crazy, but it's an issue that is only becoming worse and worse with time.
Pointless Check out Questions
And speaking of grocery stores, I'm getting a little tired of being asked these stupid pointless questions when paying for my items: "Did you find everything you were looking for?". I just mumble something affirmative and try to move the process forward. What do they expect us to say? "No, I couldn't find what I was looking for, but luckily this store sells lots of shit, so I grabbed a pile of something else." "No, I didn't find what I was looking for, though I'm quick to give up, so maybe the fault is with me." or how about "No, but don't worry. Even if I had, it wouldn't have filled the gaping emotional hole in my life."
But even if we answer "No" is the cashier really going to do anything about it? Is she going to drop everything and lead you around the store to help find the missing items? Are you going to demand that action be taken to rectify the situation? No! You're going to say "yes", pay for your crap, and try to get out of there before the long line of angry customers behind you resort to stabbing.
1 comment:
I once said "No" just to see what happened... this is what happened on that day.
It was a Monday afternoon, and I had a hankering for some tomatoe soup, and a sandwich. Being the optimistic one I dashed out to my local Lawblaws (or super store as some know it as) to buy my soup of choice. Well the store had desided to do a little renovating or something so nothing was in the right place, and emploies were scurring about. I bought my sandwich meats and bread, and headed over to where the soups SHOULD have been... there was only dog foods and treats. This didnt make any sence, the sign at the end of the row said "SOUP" so I tried the next one over... the soups were few and not what I so desperatly craved. I ended up grabbing a can of Sandwich Gravy instead. When it was my turn at the check out Amanda (the hot blonde chashier) asked me if I found everything, which I replied "No". She said "alright" and started scanning my items. I never did get my tomatoe soup that day... I twas as if my answer was nothing to her... I vowed that day that Amanda was my sworn enemy. Later that night around 10:30pm when the store was closing I met Amanda at her car and slit her throte... but my hunger for tomatoe soup was not satisfied at all..........
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